Far less than gold

ByKevin Kuzma

Far less than gold

My walk toward the Lord began on a path paved with something far lesser than gold.

His plan was a secret to me, so I didn’t realize when I took my first steps toward Him. For years I was lost and wandering, trying to find something that brought purpose to my life. I thought I could find my own way without any instruction. I found myself in the strangest places, none of which were holy. My feet were dirty with dust from the road and the filth of the terrible houses where I deliberately set out to ruin myself.

The walk was tiring and at times I slipped into dazes. Once I awoke to find I was piling debris on the street—pulling litter from the roadside into huge heaps ahead of me. My hands and arms and even my face and chest were marked with bloody scratches where I tried to climb over or crawl under my own mistakes. I tried pushing high with my hands, and then low with my shoulder. I couldn’t budge the pile. The shadow loomed over me.

My strength gone, I dropped to my knees and put my head on the pavement. My lips began to form a prayer, not of desperation or hopelessness, but rather one of gratitude. He broke me there on the street where I knelt. I was overcome with an awareness of my blessings. Everything he had given me became so clear, the gift of my children especially. How could I not praise him for it all? How could I not recognize where it was that I was walking? Straight into his heart.

When I opened my eyes, I was still kneeling … but now in a city. I was in the middle of its greatest street—golden, as pure as transparent glass. He led me here through a path of complete submission. Heaven was opened to me and for the children I am raising. On this golden street of a golden city, I closed my eyes to it all so I could pray again to my Lord. One day I hope not only to visit, but to make my home along this very street. I don’t know its name, but I understand where it is now.

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4 Comments so far

TamaraPosted on10:12 pm - Dec 26, 2019

So inspiring, and felt a closeness of what you have written!.. love it a lot!

KarebearPosted on12:53 am - Jan 10, 2020

There comes that day if you have an open heart and spirit that one realizes that God made you just for you kids and they for you. This world keeps shoving independence down our throats…no we’re meant to live in groups, our family, and our children. The way I stand up for them, protect them, provide for them, talk to them, teach them things for example, lead by example, fail by example, and so much more that we all three experience helped me realize the beautiful joy and happiness I have always wanted was in them! More than that my purpose in this life lies with being a mother, teacher and protector to them! I’ve also been down on my knees in gratitude and thankfulness, in those times when I find myself bitter and complaining, or just going through really rough times. Then my children come with the most of unexpected of words or love and I am reminded why I am for them and why they are for me. God speaks to my spirit why I he will raise me up to be there for them and like his word says, “I have never seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging for bread.” God has been so good to us and so faithful! Just when I thought all Hope was lost on several occasions he brought a blessing out of nowhere. My only regret now that they are older I wish and regret not having had one more, that is my wish between God and I though though, I’m not ashamed to say it anymore. While my worldly co-workers laugh at me and say I’m crazy, like there’s so much out there watching sports and eating burgers at bars drinking away on a daily basis, to me there’s no life in that, to me there’s no bigger meaning in this life than the love for my children! I’d rather be hanging out with them.

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